26.10.10

Zombie


"All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream."


Days are becoming those of you clutching your winter coat. As the winter air bites against your cheeks and whispers it's secrets of the coming of winter. And you shiver as it kisses your nose and fingers. My nose reminisces that of Rudolph in about the time of two minutes. I fear that everywhere I step I stick out like a sore thumb. But every day I am told of how Austrian I look. Thank goodness that my dreadfully pale complexion is one of normality here.
My days have dwindled down to normalities and reminders of my life at home. My school schedule is that of bliss without Math, French, Physics, and others. My mind pounders and strings together sentences of German quicker than I ever though it would. And my English skills seems to be at a standstill. As I have to conjure up the English word when asked by a friend now instead of it just easing off of my tongue.
Austria is still an obscured land to me. With secrets of manners and postures that I am just now discovering. It seems that it will never completely unravel its mysterious at once, like I oh so desperately wish it would.
School days are regular occurrences now. It has become less exhausting, but sometimes my eyes seems to flicker on and off with my brain. Class schedules are starting to be memorized like they should be and I scurry in every morning now feeling like this is my class. It is, however, a tremendous adjustment changing. American schools retain little similarities to that of Austrian.
November is almost halfway through now and I feel as though I wrote the other day. Yet so many things have happened. So many travels have taken place. I have been to Vienna twice. Celebrated a birthday with a friend, seen castles, drank coffee outside, visited a cemetery, and countless other things.
Your life always seems normal to you, even when it is swimming with countless events. But I enjoy that. Never feeling overwhelmed, never stressed. Just simply here. Where I want to be.

Current Book: Pride and Prejudice

20.10.10

Seasons of Changeless Change

"Don't think of this as a once in a lifetime but that your lifetime is only lived once."
-My dearest Mum

(this is my life) ^^

Time has a funny way of playing with your mind. One day you are packing your bags and the next they have been unpacked for almost two months. You feel as though you haven't missed anything that is happening at home. That everything is at a standstill. But, you realize that it won't. A lot of things have changed, yet so many things are the same. I still am the groggiest person in the mornings, still hit the snooze button multiple times, still dance while getting ready in the morning, still laugh at random jokes, and still am a huge procrastinator. You realize that you still are the same person. I'm still the same "boring" me, Austria can't change that.
Everything here is beautiful and enchanting. The streets hold comfort now. And I feel like I haven't left home. The independence is reassuring that I can take anything. But, I still feel hopeless while I wonder the streets. And got lost on purpose to waste time and just think. Walking has a pattern that calms you. That makes your thinking calming. And quiets the pounding of your heart.
Austria holds so much mystery, some that I am still unraveling. You never ask to many questions because you learn more by just observing. Seeing how your family waits until everyone is served before you eat. That you must utter a "Danke shön" after almost everything. An "Entschuldigen" after anything you do that could ultimately put harm to anyone. If you simply brush shoulders with someone it is said. Austrians are passionately friendly, but still retain the coldness of a European. And their friendships leave you baffled as they are nothing like those that I am used to. Everything is new and grand.
Seasons of Changeless Change come as I stay the same yet am reinvented. They come with the glistening change of the autumn leaves. And I await to see the change that comes next. To see how I amount upon my arrival home.
And until later, Tschüs.

Current Book: Into The Wild